Today, I am choosing to make up my mind to completely and fully trust God.
Fine time to finally do so, but better late than never. In fact, given all that I have dealt with lately, this is a greater time than ever for me to make up my mind about numerous of things. Right now I am in the longest faith walk of my life (Seriously!) and I realize that it is timeout for me going to God, praying and then walking away from His feet only to pick up doubt again. In fact the bible tells us very clearly that if we do just that, that we should not expect to receive anything. It also tells us that without faith it is IMPOSSIBLE to please God. And I wanna please God y’all!!!!
So, as previously stated, I am making up my mind to trust God in this place that I am in right now. Making up my mind to have faith in spite of what I see. Making up my mind to command my soul to activate faith when my flesh wants to waver. Making up my mind to show up for whatever God orchestrates to do with my life and to show up ready to move when He says move. I have made up my mind that God’s Will for my life is worth it even when it does separate me from most, or even causes me to look crazy. I have finally, at 28 years old, made up my mind to not be afraid of the calling over my life but to embrace it unapologetically. I’ve even made up my mind to give up anything, any person, and state of mind that does not feed the woman I am becoming and to be content in doing so.
I realize that if God is going to do anything in me and my life, it will take faith and belief in Him. I understand that I can’t be praying His will for me and then walking away to doubt Him just because it isn’t looking the way that I thought it would. I now have seen how unstable my past double-mindedness has made me and I have made up my mind to do better. I want to be where God wants me so desperately and I will do whatever internal spritual work it takes to get there.
“5 If any of you lacks wisdom, you should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to you. 6 But when you ask, you must believe and not doubt, because the one who doubts is like a wave of the sea, blown and tossed by the wind. 7 That person should not expect to receive anything from the Lord. 8 Such a person is double-minded and unstable in all they do.”~James 1:5-8